I have to try my best not to laugh or say something utterly snarky when I hear someone make a comment like, "well I'm young and healthy, and don't have a history of miscarriage in my family....so I'm sure things will be fine." O_o Really? That's interesting, because up until February 27th, 2012, I thought I was "young, and healthy, and didn't have a history of loss" in my family either. There isn't a single woman who THINKS she will be the one to face recurrent pregnant loss. But now, almost eight months since my first loss, with two additional to speak of, and a little baby in my belly, I have come to terms with the fact that I am the 1 in 100.
Today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day, and as a friend so eloquently put it, "Pregnancy and Infant Loss is not just something that happens to 'somebody else'. It happens to your sister, your friend, your coworker, the girl who checks out your groceries... it happened to me. It affects many families every day."
Losing a child that you so desparately wanted is something that changes you completely. It has left marks on my heart that have redefined my entire identity. Loss is something you don't get over, or forget, even with the hope of another child. It stays with you and bleeds into your thoughts everyday.
It's difficult for me to appreciate that each of my babies would not exist if it hadn't been for the loss of the other. I wouldn't be pregnant with the baby I currently carry if I hadn't miscarried the others. This thought brings new meaning to the Rascal Flatt's lyrics, "God bless the broken road, that led me straight to you..." I hope with my whole heart that this baby is the end of our broken road, and that the losses we have suffered have served a greater purpose which was to lead us to this pregnancy, and to this baby we want to very much to love on and care for.
No comments:
Post a Comment